Monday, November 17, 2008

They're Our Rivals

In the spirit of the best rivalry in college football coming together this week (though my expectations are extremely low), here are some other things that I would like to declare as rivals:

~People who rag on community organizers
~Political double standards
~The Jonas Brothers
~High School Musical
~Especially that bushy-haired guy
~Hanna Montana
~Anything else that Disney has created for adolescents
~"We want this, but we won't help you"
~Coffeeson's bedtime
~30-50 mph wind
~Brett Favre
~Slow computers
~"Culture war" Christianity
~Political e-mail forwards
~Half-mumbled dispassionate liturgy
~Poopy diapers
~House centipedes
~Lack of coffee
~Maroon 5
~Coffeeson's runny nose
~Coffeewife's workdays
~Oatmeal raisin cookies
~Left Behind
~Those adult soap opera comic strips
~Larry the Cable Guy
~The University of Toledo
~Kirk Cameron


Anonymous said...

I think I agree with most of these. Although I'd also add Huey Lewis & The News.

Jules said...

One question: the Packer Favre or the Jets Favre?

Because trust me, to some of us there is a difference!

Jeff Nelson said...

Post-"retirement" why-don't-you-go-start-a-charity-or-something-instead media circus Favre.

So yeah, Jets Favre. :)

Scott Alan said...


Though I'll disagree with Larry the Cable Guy, since he has a luxury box in the north end zone in Lincoln and has been known to throw armloads of free hotdogs to the Cornhusker fans in the seats below his window.

Does that make us rivals?

Unknown said...

What do you mean by "adult soap opera comic strips"?
Mary Worth?
In which case I totally agree.

Jeff Nelson said...

Yeah, there's Mary Worth, Rex Morgan, and then some other one.

Jeff Nelson said...

Sally Forth. There you go.

They all pretty much suck.

Unknown said...

Might have to add Joel Osteen to your impressive listy thing.

Jeff Nelson said...

And lima beans. I forgot lima beans.